Sexless Marriages

Gia Macool

5/2/2024

Husbands often feel frustrated when their sex lives become transactional & their wives start nagging.

Common Scenario: "My girl was amazing, but after we got married, sex became nonexistent, and she started nagging about me not helping around the house." How many times have we heard this story? It's become the anthem of married households.

The Problem: Married couples often negotiate desire through materialism or household responsibilities. Trading one transaction for another doesn’t solve the issue. Desire must come from within and cannot be negotiated if you want the relationship to last.

The Solution: What you both fell in love with was an unspoken song and dance. In marriage, comfort replaces mystery, which kills desire. You must stay at the top of your game in a marriage, constantly dating each other.

Tips for Keeping Desire Alive:

  • Stay in shape

  • Do fun things together regularly

  • Keep things exciting and new

  • Be open to new experiences

  • Genuinely desire to please your spouse

If either of you fall short in these areas, address the issues immediately. Constructive criticism can be seen as unsupportive, but it's crucial for growth.

The Challenge: We live in a society that places the responsibility for happiness mostly on men, making it hard for them to bring awareness to their wives. Women must be open to constructive criticism from their husbands to maintain a healthy relationship.

Vetting a Spouse: Include frequent constructive criticism early on to gauge reactions. Focus on compatibility, not just chemistry.

Steps to Awareness:

  1. Bring awareness to the issue (present the problem).

  2. Lead by example (show acceptable behavior).

  3. Set consequences for broken boundaries.

Final Thought: Change starts with you!